While the secular world was “trick or treating” on October 31 Brisbane’s Mark and Nikki Lysaght also donned costumes – but for quite a different reason.
On the eve of the Feast of All Saints (November 1) the Greater Springfield couple dressed as St Monica “and her wayward son” St Augustine in an event with other faith-filled friends to remember some of the holy men and women “gone before us”.
“It’s quite funny really,” Nikki said in her husband’s company.
“St Monica prayed fervently for her son … our friends who know us well got the joke.”
For the purpose of this interview, Mark, Brisbane archdiocese’s exuberant vocations promotions officer, had just relayed events in his adolescence which caused him to “go off the rails”.
A car accident at 15 in his New Zealand homeland led to his derailing.
“It was a big catalyst in my life,” an honest Mark said of the accident.
“I damaged my right hand severely and staying in hospital for six weeks turned my life upside down.
“I enjoyed rugby and cricket but (after the accident) wasn’t able to hold a bat or cricket ball or play rugby.”
Admitting he already suffered from low self-esteem, Mark said he “lost control” and his parents “didn’t know what to do”.
“My sadness turned to anger and I tried any way I could to suppress that,” he said.
“I started questioning ‘What’s life and what’s my purpose’?”
Leaving school and the family nest Mark said he began driving forklifts and bought a motorbike, and was living “at party central”.
Interestingly he still went to Mass as part of a strong parish community where the Sisters of St Joseph had a significant presence.
“I didn’t realise the damage I was doing to myself and those around me,” Mark admitted of his late teens even though he was maintaining “an affiliation with the Catholic scene”.
Asked to organise and participate in an Antioch weekend – for young people to experience Jesus Christ in themselves and others – “for some unknown reason” the somewhat wayward youth “said yes”.
“I went on the weekend and went to (the sacrament of) confession properly,” Mark said.
“I laid it all on the table and felt this incredible peace.
“I remember looking at a crucifix on the wall and ‘getting it’ – that Jesus Christ died for all of us but would have done it just for me.”
Other extraordinarily profound spiritual encounters followed, Mark saying they were “better than any drug” he had ever taken.
In 1996 he served on the youth-to-youth ministry that is NET (National Evangelisation Teams).
Unsure of his future towards its end, a generous cheque from Mark’s former Marist Fathers high school arrived on the same day as “an initial sparks” meeting Nikki Seymour.
The two served in the same cohort with NET in 1997 but were adamant they “remained focused on ministry”.
Turning down a management possibility in New Zealand at the end of the following year, Mark followed his heart back to Australia.
“I remember flying over Coolangatta and it was the most surreal experience,” Mark said of his decision to plant roots in Brisbane.
“Christchurch has never felt like home again.”
The couple were married on September 7, 2002, in their home parish (at the time) of Corinda-Graceville in Brisbane.
“When we got married we always said we wanted to have three children two years apart and that’s exactly what we got,” Nikki, who was born and raised in Mackay, said.
Kaiya, 5, Xavier, 3, and Bella, 1, keep both parents on the hop, with Nikki also managing a full-time role as assistant principal for religious education (APRE) at St Mark’s primary school, Inala.
“I have loved learning about the different cultures (at St Mark’s) and about how they express their faith,” the journalism and education graduate said.
Nikki’s also a newly-returned pilgrim from the canonisation of St Mary MacKillop, eager to share stories with students and staff alike. She attended with her mother.
“I see my role as a teacher,” she said.
“But not only for the students but also the staff themselves.
“I’m still a ‘baby APRE’ though and I love learning about liturgy and putting liturgies together.”
The eloquent and youthful woman of faith previously taught at St Augustine’s College, Springfield, where Kaiya attends, and spoke glowingly about the area, soon to be formalised as a parish.
“The day we settled (on the contract of the house in Augustine Heights) we took the kids over and a bottle of champagne,” she said.
“When we were leaving all the families in the street came over to welcome … then they realised I had taught some of their kids.
“(And) that welcome has continued to this day,” Mark added.
The family, who live a stone’s throw from the school, said neighbours took Kaiya to school as part of “a support network” they’re grateful for.
“We’ve struggled to have gone from being part of a parish community for so long to a developing community,” Mark admitted of their two-year address.
“But we’ve started to put roots down and there’s much excitement as our new parish is starting to evolve.”
Nikki has almost completed her Masters in Religious Education while Mark, who has qualifications in pastoral counselling and ministry “never thought a degree was possible after flunking out at school”.
Agreeing they “pinch themselves” sometimes, both easily articulated the “why” of their individual and collective joy.
“I think Nix is extraordinary in her ability to get her things done,” Mark said.
“She’s achieved where she’s always wanted to get – to have influence in bringing faith alive in children and for the teachers as well because her passion for children enables her to strive for that.”
Mark has been responsible for the creation of popular and faith-filled youth and young adult activities such as the Sunday afternoon gig, Leaven Hour and the Friday night gig.
He also played a pivotal role in the co-ordination of Brisbane’s St Mary MacKillop celebrations in the St Stephen’s Cathedral precinct – even while Nikki had a Roman vantage point.
“Mark is incredibly dedicated and incredibly loyal,” she said.
“He’s passionate and once he has his sights set on things, he’s determined to get there.
“Mark loves me, he loves our children, he loves his job and he’s passionate about evangelisation. Because he’s passionate that gives him the strength and the energy to cope and keep all the balls in the air.”
Mark also has a finger in the pie of the men-to-men ministry menALIVE – so far encouraging hundreds of males here and abroad and of all ages to take “time out” of their lives to look introspectively.
“Our life is full-on,” he said, “But that’s what we chose.” – Nikki soon adding their coping strategies.
“We both work long hours and are dedicated to our work and the family and to each other,” she said.
“We try and divide the household duties.”
“Our style of relationship is that we are best friends and we spend hours a day just talking,” Mark added.
“Everything from the incredibly deep things of our lives to (the band) Pearl Jam.”
Other strategies include daily prayer as a family, “shared learnings”, “respecting the dignity of each other”, not “going to bed angry”, saying “I love you” even if annoyed with each other, and “not setting ultimatums or hitting below the belt”.
The couple agreed “it all falls apart at times” but they remain focused on using God-given gifts and talents, always striving to live “life to the fullest” as He promises.
“I’ve made silly choices in my life and a lot of things have gone wrong,” Mark said.
“We have a mortgage, school fees and all those normal things.
“(But) we’re incredibly blessed to be working in the archdiocese – there’s evangelisation in all that we do.”
It seems the celebration of the Feast of All Saints was no exception.