AN idyllic Christmas holiday on a remote island in the Philippines ignited a “fire” Kristine Lehmann has bravely managed to walk away from.
“Having gone through this fire … if my daughters and I did not hold on to God we would have come out damaged,” she said candidly, relaying the events of December 29, 2002.
The family of five – including husband, Tony, and daughters Rae, Nikki and Drew – were dining with family friends in their beach house with “no walls, just a thatch roof and huge pillars of hardwood tree trunks holding that up”.
At 8pm “six masked men with M-16s” entered and took Tony and another man “hostage”.
Tony was heard pleading and offering medical and financial assistance.
There was no response to Tony’s plea.
“(The) home offered no protection from automatic rifle fire,” Kristine said of the barrage of bullets fired as the women and guests “hid in the loft”.
Kristine crept down the steps and behind some trees to edge towards the parking area.
“Then the van’s engine switched on and we heard it roar off,” she said.
“That was the last I saw of my husband.”
Tony and Kristine attended the same Catholic school in Manila, but didn’t mix in the same circles because of their four-year age difference.
A 23-year-old Tony “noticed” his bride-to-be when they both returned from overseas jaunts. The striking couple dated for two years and were married in San Antonio parish, Manila, on January 5, 1986.
As their family expanded Kristine recognised a need to provide for their daughters a “strong influence of God” as she had had.
“Going back to church strengthened Tony and I,” she said, adding, “We now had this relationship with God.”
Visiting their “private beach” during holiday times, the Lehmanns attempted to literally “build up” the surrounding area through roads and new infrastructure.
When Tony was taken, Kristine’s focus shifted.
“Through the trying months and various military operations (to look for Tony), I have witnessed both the best and the worst in humankind,” she said.
Scripture helped not to inflame the “fire” at this time, Kristine saying she often read from Isaiah.
“But this is what the Lord says: ‘Yes captives will be taken from warriors and plunder retrieved from the fierce, I will contend with those who contend with you, and your children I will save’,” she quoted (49:2).
When she was “worried” if her “standing in faith with God would lead to disappointment” she read another Isaiah passage (54:4): “Do not be afraid, you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace, you will not be humiliated.”
And in times of “hopelessness” from St Paul’s writings to the Romans Kristine leant on: “Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed” and, “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose”. (8:28)
For two years the family searched for Tony, aided by close friends and family – some “risking their lives” – until finally there was “a realisation he wasn’t coming back”.
“For two years I did think he was,” Kristine said.
“My cousin, Tony’s best friend … told me to ‘turn the page and not to look back with guilt’.”
Kristine and her daughters – whom she calls a “sorority” – made plans to migrate to Australia.
Finally settling on the Gold Coast in 2005, Kristine said she often thinks, “What if Tony walked in today?”
“That would be weird,” she said with a broad, loving smile.
“(But) we have turned a page.”
Nikki, now 22, is studying medicine, Rae, 19, is focusing on engineering while Drew has begun Year 11.
Kristine said the girls were “strong into their faith as well” and had many insights into the effect of not knowing the truth of their father’s disappearance.
“The island changed the girls,” she said.
“It’s part of their identity … they always want to visit.”
Nowadays the women “are very wary” but feel safer in Australia.
“I know God is good all the time,” Kristine said.
“God wants us to have a life in his light … (and) I have to believe God is bringing us to a better place, hopefully with Tony.”
While on the “top of the list” is finding out the truth of her husband’s disappearance and creating a “resting place” for him, Kristine has written an account of their experiences.
Its pages reflect the perspective of a realist who remains optimistic.
“Life is a bit of a war sometimes,” Kristine said.
“You have to surround yourself with people you can trust and count on – people who have good motives.
“My girls are my allies … and we’ve come through the fire refined.”