What signs do you look out for when navigating the dating scene?
It’s unlikely you’ll be able to tell when you first meet or go on your first date or around the time when you start saying “I love you”, but there are some early warning signs to look out for before getting too deep into the relationship:
They pressure you to move the relationship at a faster pace than you are ready for
They seem overly concerned with your life and offer frequent advice that feels like non-negotiable instructions
Your friends are less than thrilled about your relationship
You find yourself making excuses for their behaviour
They blame their problems on other people or play the victim
They start sentences with “If you really love me you’d …”
They don’t like it when you spend time with your family or friends and can’t look your parents in the eye
They have possessive or controlling tendencies
While there are many forms of abuse (physical, emotional, sexual, spiritual, verbal, economic, and mental), the best way to know if you are being abused is to ask yourself the question, “Do I feel afraid of what might happen if I do something contrary to what my partner would prefer?”.
I know from experience how hard it is to look past that initial feeling of being loved and pursued to see your partners’ controlling tendencies for what they really are, but early detection is so important.
Preventing getting too deep into an abusive relationship is always preferable to curing the wounds of domestic violence.
Know the signs and steer clear of anyone who doesn’t treat you right.
Michaela Daphne is the author of Purlieu, a young adult fantasy thriller about a girl who runs away with her boyfriend when she should have run from him.
The Catholic Leader is an Australian award-winning Catholic newspaper that has been published by the Archdiocese of Brisbane since 1929. Our journalism seeks to provide a full, accurate and balanced Catholic perspective of local, national and international news while upholding the dignity of the human person.
The Catholic Leader acknowledges Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people as the First Peoples of this country and especially acknowledge the traditional owners on whose lands we live and work throughout the Catholic Archdiocese of Brisbane.