Family Faith by Selina Venier
MASS etiquette, what is it?
It’s dressing appropriately, giving the time willingly and not in pursuit of entertainment, arriving punctually and my personal favourite among many others, not leaving before Mass is finished.
“Let’s go, there’s two more verses yet,” said a parishioner to a companion in front of us during a recessional recently.
Only one verse was played so their exit must have been hasty indeed.
While I understand there are times requiring such haste, if the urgency is imagined or invented then the whole “leaving before Mass is actually finished” thing is a little bit offensive, or a whole lot.
Vacant seats well before the Mass’s real conclusion is sad indeed.
Instead I teach my children that exiting the church once the time of prayer is completed is good manners.
More than that it allows us to experience the entirety of the Mass including the final blessing.
I assume my fellow parishioner, who knew the recessional well enough to know it had “two more verses”, of which I had no clue, is likely to be a seasoned Catholic.
That thought made me even sadder.
“Unobvious Mass etiquette” might come in the form of how to walk past the chalice of the Precious Blood of Jesus Christ at Communion time.
I respect another’s decision to not receive the Precious Blood but why walk past Jesus at that moment and not at least pause or bow in reverence and then keep going?
That too I consider good manners.
While I’m only a layperson making an observation, this might be a practise worthy of consideration.
And now to a more modern quandary involving appropriate etiquette: Do Easter greetings sent via text message count?
I received a few and they too left me wondering.
One “Happy Easter” came without elaboration and wasn’t personalised so I assume it was sent to a group of people.
“Oh,” I said with surprised tone, “That’s nice, haven’t heard from him in a while.”
“Thank you,” I replied and returned the wishes in a more personalised form.
So yes, even though it was brief and unpersonalised it did “count”.
Another Easter greeting came addressed with our names.
My feeling on receiving it was different however.
It was more like an “Oh,” with a downward sliding tone.
The sender, whom I also hadn’t heard from for ions, took the time to type the message but not call.
Again, it was a little sad.
In a strange way I felt better about receiving the non-personalised message although both did “count”.
While we saw or spoke to those nearest and dearest at Easter, I admit to having sent a group email of wishes to extended friends and family. This was better than no message at all and the best etiquette I could manage with the time at my fingertips.
Naturally I’d welcome speaking to any of those people personally and wish I had the time to do so. That will come at various intervals through the year I hope and pray.
Keeping in touch with a widening circle of family, friends, neighbours and work colleagues, past and present, takes effort.
That’s true for our relationship with God as well.
I appreciate relationships with people who take the time to be in relationship.
In my experience, new Easter Catholics are good at taking the time to be in relationship with God.
They’re the ones smiling in the pews, staying until the final chorus is well and truly sung and lingering afterwards.
God bless their zeal for the faith.
May the memory of the Easter Vigil for new Catholics worldwide live long in their hearts and may they always find seasoned Catholics to model just how much faith and its practise counts.
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